Thank You for today, thank you for the food You have provided. Thank You for my beautiful children. Thank You for my neighbours, Thank You for my church near by, thank You for the people I meet and make friends with at church, Thank You for my Mum and My Dad, and Thank You that they adopted me when I was just a small baby. Thank You that my parents are Christians and took me to church when I was very young and that I stayed in that church till I was eighteen. Thank You for the singing and for the music in my family. Thank You for the lovely sunday school children’s songs which My Mum used to sing. Thank You for my gentle, soft and loving father and may he Rest In Peace. Thank You for my two brothers Stewart and Peter whom my parents also adopted and for the laughter and good times that we shared together. Thank You for Mother’s day which comes on Sunday, March 18th in the U.K. Thank You for Lent which is falling now and continues until Easter weekend begins with Good Friday when Our Lord Jesus Christ was crucified on the cross and died for our sins. Thank You for all the Lutheran Pastors that I met and their children throughout my childhood and the depth of experience that it provided for my Soul and for my Heart and for my Mind. Thank You for my home and my gardens. Thank You for my warm and comfortable bed. Thank You for my telephone from which I can reach out to my friends and family and for my computer from which I can reach out to the Internet to reveal to people my true purpose. God…You know me. You know my mind, You know my heart and You know my Soul. You know my problems and You know my triumphs. Each day can be a battle between good and evil but You have already won that battle by sending your Son to us Jesus Christ for Sacrificing Him on the Cross so that He could win back our Souls. Thank You for Your Son and Your Holy Spirit. Thank You for the blessings which the Holy Spirit provides for us. Father, Son and Holy Ghost , three in one , a deity. Thank You Lord for giving me life and for never leaving me. Thank You for forgiving me my sins everyday. Thank You for the mercy You bestow on me. I am grateful for your Love every single day. I look forward to the day when Lord you take me by the hand to be with You in Eternal Life.
Thank You for Grace, Mercy and Peace and most of all thank You for Your Enduring and Eternal Love.
I went to bed last night at one oclock in the morning really…and then woke up at 6:30a.m. so I didn’t get enough sleep really. So I was really grumpy… I mean REALLY grumpy and what I call AGITATED in block capitals!!!!
Moving on….the day was pretty shit…so then I was feeling sleepy sitting by the fire at around 4.oopm in the afternoon and then I fought that sleep and went to bed at 6.00pm …and then woke up at 12 midnight…..slept really well though.
So…now its 02:24 in the early hours of the morning I am still awake ….balls!!!
So….I am relaxing and watching the end of “The Only Way Is Essex” and have decided to turn the t.v. off when that programme finishes in 10 minutes or so…and then go to bed. I will need to set the alarm I think so I do not sleep in too late.
Tomorrow is Sunday so I like to go to church on a Sunday and I am looking forward to going to that.
I have been to see the G.P. this week and I have got some help with nicotene addiction. I am trying to slow down my smoking habit which I restarted in July 2009 after quitting when I was pregnant and breastfeeding Jennifer( for 9 months I breastfed her). Even when I was on a Section and then hospitalised in Broadoak from Late November to early April 2009 – I still managed to stay off the cigarettes – although I have to say that during my hospitalisation at Broadoak in Broadgreen, Liverpool I may have put on up to 3 or 4 stones in weight … so fizzy drinks and chocolate and fattening food replaced something that I may have felt was missing inside of me. The fact that I didn’t stay in a Mother and Baby unit whilst I was unwell did nothing to help my situation. They (Merseycare) offered me a place in a mother and baby in Leeds, Yorkshire, and the thought of going there was just intolerable to me because it was just so so far away.
Unfortunately at the time the mother and baby unit in Manchester was full and unfortunately for me and other mothers who live in Merseyside – the catchment area which Merseycare covers – there wasn’t a Mother and Baby unit in Liverpool or even in Merseyside. How is it that a huge, money making company like Merseycare which supports all sorts of mental illness – still cannot find the funding to have a Mother and Baby unit in Liverpool or close by to support mothers who are experiencing depression, be it post-natal or other forms???????
It doesn’t seem fair to me….that the closest unit is in Manchester??? How does that work??? Not very effective for me and my daughter Jennifer.
No…In my mind…Merseycare needs a Mother and baby unit to support mothers who have just given birth or even before the birth possibly and need the extra support that would provide in MERSEYSIDE! Come on guys!!! Let us all work to achieve this goal and make good come out of a bad experience!!!
Going through bipolar and back again.
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